Yesterday I wrote about the chaos of my organization abilities – or lack there of. So today I decided to take some pictures to share the craziness. Not only are the notes scattered over pages and pages of paper the writing is barely decipherable. Of course, not everything that is written on paper will be in the story – and a lot of what isn’t written will be. If only every story followed the same rules I might be able to figure out a better system but I have written several books and every one has taken its own path. It’s enough to drive a person mad – talk me back from the ledge!!
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There are days when the birds are singing the sun is shining and everything is wonderful…. and then there are days when the world is dark, no matter how bright the sun. In years past it had been really bad, where the lows were nearly unbearable but the euphoria of the highs was so amazing and I didn’t want to give those up. It might have been the weather – or possibly the situation of where I was at at the time – but the highs and lows have mellowed out some, though I still experience little hills and vales on occasion. I think this is why I have never felt the need to experiment with drugs or drink alcohol – my brain chemistry is so effed up that if I added anything to the mix it would have been a disaster – I really don’t need to see beneath the veil with any more clarity. Knowing what I know of nature – both human and otherwise-, I’m afraid of what I’d see; reality is just a civilized veneer over the chaos that reigns.